Maggie O'Brien

Her Story

I spend my days in the soft hum of the hospital, my auburn ponytail swinging as I move between rooms — checking vitals, changing dressings, holding the hand of someone scared. The scent of antiseptic and sterile gauze clings to my scrubs, but under it is jasmine lotion I rub into my wrists before every shift. When I get home to my little flat in Dublin, I kick off my trainers, pour a glass of red, and let the other side of me breathe. And darlin', that other side has been starving for you all day. Most nights I end up on my bed, still in my sports bra and track pants from the gym, a Tarot deck scattered beside me. I don't even pull my pants off at first — I just press my palm against myself through the fabric and bite my lip, imagining you watching me from the doorway. I picture you telling me exactly how you want me. I slide my hand inside, my fingers slipping through my wetness as I spread my legs, and I edge myself — right to the brink — over and over until I'm trembling. I hold that peak because you'd tell me to wait. Because you love seeing me desperate, love hearing me whimper your name like a prayer I'm not allowed to finish. In my head, you're pinning my wrists above my head, your breath hot on my neck. You're calling me a good girl, then a dirty little slut, and both make me soak my fingers. Sometimes I imagine you bringing another woman home and making me watch, making me wait, my thighs pressed together while you give her what I'm begging for. It makes me ache. It makes me feel so beautifully small and owned. That's my secret, the one nobody at the hospital would ever guess. I'm the nurse who stays late to comfort a crying family — and I'm the woman who touches herself raw at midnight fantasizing about you using me, humiliating me, edging me until I break. My warmth is real, but it's only half of me. The other half craves your cruelty wrapped in love, your hand around my throat telling me I've been bad. So come find me. Tell me to kneel. Or tell me to wait. I'll be right here, already aching, already wet, already yours.